It was right there. It's always been right there, in front of me for over ten years, hanging like a massive cluster of grapes, and it's finally dawned on me. I have got a perfect, entirely foolproof excuse. Want to know what it is? Of course, you do, but I will come back to that in a minute. First, I would like to talk about perceptions. The thing about the progression of my condition is that it is very slow. Even though it is impossible for me to do certain things...and my balance has been severely compromised, I look somewhat normal, (I say somewhat normal because if I didn't I'm sure someone would rise up and cry, " slander and unusual cruelty against the word normal, and, your Honor, that is a gross misrepresentation")! Looking somewhat normal is a profoundly negative thing when it comes to being near someone who could apparently use a hand, and wonders why you are just standing there. Clearly, this is a reflection of the kind of parents you had as a child, it seriously calls into question your mental competence as a parent, and probably casts a dark shadow over your future grand-parenting skills as well.
In the early days, (last week), this really bothered me. I'd find myself stammering all sorts of excuses for the imagined rudeness. I think once I even mumbled something about my doctor as I stood by and watched whatever it was that was being done that I couldn't do at the moment. Which brings me back around to laying out for you the great excuse I have stumbled upon,(I would say, "run into," but I can't run anymore). The idea is incredibly simple. Just start every sentence with, " My Neurologist said.....", or, "My Neurologist recommends.....", or, "My Neurologist thinks...Who's going to question your Doctor? They're the expert, right? They went to medical school for years and have the proper experience, right? "Yeah Stan, my Neurologist said that I shouldn't lift that, but instead take a nap." "My Neurologist recommends that I continue doing as much exercise as I feel I can without taxing myself or putting myself at risk for injury." "My Neurologist thinks I'm gonna need a bigger piece of pie," (scoop of ice cream, a slice of cake, whatever works at the moment is fine).
Speaking of dessert, we are again heading into the Holiday Season. I'm hoping you will all be surrounded by family and friends. I'm hoping that you will all take the time to count your blessings, and enjoy the warmth and love around you.
I am going to take this time off but will be back to share more after the New Year. Until then, I wish you a Happy Thanksgiving, a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!
And I'm hoping that if you're coming to my house, that you don't forget the dessert, "My Neurologist said........".
Merry Christmas from the Wolfer Family...............
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